Wednesday, June 23, 2010

I gaze up at the sky and the lightning tears it apart. The guilt eats me up alive. Clouds obliterate the sky. I love them,the clouds.I see something in them most of the time,if not always. The bustling-with-sloth-and-sullen-activities town obstructs my vision of the road. I still can trace the silhouette of high-rising-towering towers meant to conceal within its gray walls the silence of obscurity,of loneliness,of mobility not owning to some purpose,any purpose but to being afraid,perhaps to smile too much because it's not the smile coming from a jovial dressed gaily in ribbons and flounces-it's more like pleading,pleading for what,I know not. The rains stopped pounding fists on the window,my window,even when I'd have greeted it with open arms. I want to be able to tell someone,my someone "look how beautiful the view is",but too bad I can't think of a name. I want to be out,all by myself and not be sloshed with bereavement. I want to be out there and not be scared. I want to be out there and let the loneliness engulf me not forcefully but owing to my own volition. I want to be out there and kill the void that deepens day by day and the need of having someone to hold onto. All I ask for is freedom and the right to choose what I can see and what not.. I am not ready to face the dark world,not the whole of it,not yet..

23 comments:

Indian Psycho said...

I find the write-ups quite interesting...The only limitation of mine - I'm not quite as genius or talented at words! So sometimes it just goes off the head, cause I don't like reading with dictionary alongside! I like the last line, the spontaneity! :)

Shreya. said...

Argh!
It bugs me when people tell me that dictionary thing!

Indian Psycho said...

Average person knows about 60,000 words...
I'm low on gray matter...and the ones I know are "oh, yes, no, nice, fine"...
In all, I'm not surprised if i fall short of 'em often!
But it was appreciation, i must assure!

Shreya. said...

Um..whosoever you are,you definitely don't look like you're 'low on gray matter'.

Indian Psycho said...

Lol! I'm curious how that observation comes...Anyways, keep writing, your way (leaving aside some psycho who couldn't figure parts of it)!

Shreya. said...

No.I'd rather you tell me as to how I could make it more y'know comprehensible!

Indian Psycho said...

Lol! Don't devoid this man of learning! The day I begin getting it all, we would lose individuality, cause we've diff train of thoughts!

Shreya. said...

We'd understand each other a bit more,more like!
Not the same as losing individuality!
God.Big word,individuality!

Indian Psycho said...

Maybe. Maybe not.

Shreya = Someone different. You would dislike if tomorrow morning you wake up and people begin recognizing you as "madonna, anushka shankar, or michael jackson for one"

Shreya. said...

You're going off the track,totally!
And I love Michael Jackson and just so you'd know,I wouldn't mind!
:)

Indian Psycho said...

Lucky enough!

I love Paz Vega, but don't want the complete gender transformation! :)

*Regrets for the parabolic deviations being off the track!!

Shreya. said...

Are you a blogger?
Or just a random reader pouring comments generously everywhere?

Indian Psycho said...

Haha!! There are few blogs i read!

I like knowing and communicating, so it's not always criticizing!

And what i write, is far worse than a 10 year old's diary!

Shreya. said...

I wouldn't believe till I read.

Indian Psycho said...

See, I don't think deep, or perhaps I don't have enough sensibilities to write so. So its all a confused outlook! Quite shit!

Anyways, http://random-workaholic.blogspot.com/

Shreya. said...

I read one.Rather half of one.Too depressing.

Indian Psycho said...

Ahh...I told you...A ten year old would've been better. It's not meant to depress others, just that it was li'l shit around my life. I reassure, its complete truthful shit, and wasn't actually meant to be read, just spit, when I was in most need of doing that!

Shreya. said...

I'm sure.The thing is I can't handle such things.I mean the ones speaking eloquently of pain,suffering,disease and death.I don't take them well.

Indian Psycho said...

Hmmm..not quite surprised! Many people don't!! And I didn't expect :)

P.S : The 'Indian psycho' name actually comes not from my character... i saw just a movie by such name, and added li'l patriotism! :D

Shreya. said...

What'd be your real name then?

Indian Psycho said...

Your inquisitiveness is good...but might kick ass me!! It's not secret (or any exaggeration one would make), but postpone it for being! :)

Indian Psycho said...

Lol! I just read the "thought of the day" on your blog!

“I am afraid to show you who I really am, because if I did, you might not like it--and that's all I got”

Shreya. said...

Uh.Sure.

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